Sunday, June 26, 2011

growing up

it is the week of my birth.
i wonder what my mom was thinking about?
managing 3 other children carrying me inside
in the heat of june.

june 29, 1973 i came into this world.
the vietnam war had finally ended
and the world was in it's regular disarray.
i knew nothing about it. i was new.

growing year after year i became aware.
i grew with a sensitive heart.
the years were not always easy.
some years i thought i would break.

love kept me growing.
i sat an edge of cliff in 1989 and chose life.
i live a life of love because i cannot imagine any other way.
as years pass and i grow, i see value in everyday.

i celebrate my breath.
i celebrate the blessings who walk beside me.
i celebrate a voice that stills my soul.
i celebrate the chance to sit with broken pieces
and make a mosaic of love.
growing up.

Monday, June 13, 2011

"what is love and what does it want for the other?"


Answer:
God is love.
Love designed each human with an intricate fingerprint unique to self.
Love gave itself a fingerprint to allow human hands to hold intimately.
Love looked into the eyes of humanity and absorbed all the images and feelings of past, present, and future sufferings.
Love embraced and rung out hate and left humanity standing.
Love wrapped around humanity while hates inferno engulfed all that was pure and prevented the new of humanity from being scorched.
Love survived.
Love accepts confusion with simple patience.
Love shouts in rain thrust winds when our ears are open to hear decibels that hurt.
Love allows humanity to hand hold and embrace each other after stone hearts become flesh.
Love wants us to know love and share it.
Without love we are a lifeless cinder of wreckage.
With love we are a wild iris amongst ferns.
With love I wrap my arms around new humanity.
In love I embrace you.
God is love.
I am love.
You are love.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

1995

tomorrow all of the summer staff arrive. i remember the feelings i had when i walked onto the recreation field back in 1995. as a young 21 year old, i was unsure of everything and excited for my summer at camp. everyone seemed to express their arrival differently. some of the staff were returning and reuniting with warm hellos and hugs. i felt alone. i remember writing in my journal that i really wanted god to reveal why i was at camp, because i felt out of place. it was when i met my first cabin of campers that i knew why. i was here to love. tomorrow when the staff gather on the recreation field and orientation begins, i know why i am at camp. i am here to love. 1995-2011, god's purpose has not changed. some will feel the same way i did, but i will be there for them. they will meet the campers in a week and know why god has brought them here. they will love well and they will grow. we will all grow to love more. tomorrow.

heart of flesh

"i will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; i will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And i will put my spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws." ezekiel 26: 36-37
nature has a way of reminding us of a life we lived seemingly a lifetime ago. a reservoir of stones dropped at sea, tumbled in the surf and returned to shore. a graveyard of old hearts, reminders of living a life with a heart beating in rhythm  with our creator. my old heart is lost at sea. i am alive with god.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

"little warrior"

"i will be the silver beard guy who whispers how much your parents love you in your ear. i will stare in awe at you and a tear may escape. i pray for you daily."










welcome to the world Wyatt. You can call me friend.

bearded and bald

i use to grow my beard in the winter. this year my vacation came in spring and so did my beard. i use to think a beard seemed unprofessional. i live and work in the redwood forest. i think my beard fits my profession nicely. i use to think i would not enjoy getting older. now i thoroughly enjoy growing old with my wife. you can learn a lot from a spouse and the lessons learned do not have to do with gender. i learned a little bit about that last week. :)

Thursday, June 9, 2011

brilliant * gorgeous * talented * fabulous

"...Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are 
you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." -Marianne Williamson









deliRious or DIVINE

there is a fine line between delirious and divine in the wee-hours of morning.

the subtle silliness seeps in and makes you start to rhyme.
= delirious.
the bathing of dark night songs sends hymns to their creator.
= divine.

in silence the whole world seems to be separated from my space with God.
= divine.
in racing thoughts of past unforeseen misfortune chaos keeps my eyes open.
= delirious.

hours sitting awake leave me restless and without presence in the day.
= delirious.
hours spent alone with God has helped me learn to be silent and listen.
= divine.

whether delirious or divine, i have chose neither, but they are mine.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

nature my companion

i am who i am.
i accept the gift of self awareness.
assurance of God's design.
wherever He leads,
whether in my spirit or movement,
i choose to be brave and true.

i love all  of creation.
i do not always know how to relate
human to human.
with nature i am comfortably fluent.
the forest, the ocean, the prairie, the desert,
all creation speaks my soul language.
i walk free of expectations and human perceptions.

i am who i am.
i am a sweet spirited man who walks easy in nature.
i am still a learning human who needs
humans to be patient with me.



















written while sitting on bluff at big sur: may 20, 2011 
(j and o sitting a bluff away.)

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

living water continuum

giving out and taking in.
like a tide rolling in and out against the shore.
tumbling the exposed excess for others to take hold.
reeling in, pulling the salts, the nutrients.
necessities to survive, to continue.
low tide hunger, pushing forward.
high tide needed, thirsting for submersion.
swallowed in and swept away.
parched, quenched, engulfed.
living water continuum.

written: may 19, 2011 on the cliffs near big sur waiting for friends to arrive.

a * b * i * d * e

the sun always rises and sets
even when the clouds and fog
hide it from view.

no matter what the day brings
my life belongs to another
and i choose to abide.

abide |əˈbīd|verb[ intrans. ( abide by) accept or act in accordance with (a rule, decision, or recommendation) I said I would abide by their decision.[ trans. ( can/could not abide) informal be unable to tolerate (someone or something) if there is one thing I cannot abide it is a lack of discipline.[ intrans. (of a feeling or a memory) continue without fading or being lost.• archaic live; dwell.ORIGIN Old English ābīdan [wait,] from ā- onward’ bīdan (see bide).

Monday, June 6, 2011

reminder

always let the water touch your feet.
it makes a moment switch
from melancholy to exhilarating in an instant.

Friday, June 3, 2011

radiant-beautiful-miraculous-creation

photo taken by Lori Jo Bradford at Wilder Ranch

ellibella skye is everything her name means. 
she catches you in her glow and presence. her beauty is beyond description. she lives bravely amongst nature and embraces all creation. she thinks deeply and feels much. she is a faithful friend. she is an offerer of peace and walks in it. she is 11 today. she makes me smile when i am caught up in her radiance. she is a gift. she is my second daughter. my only elli. she calls me weird. she is like her mom. when she laughs at my jokes, i really know she found me funny. i love when she says my name. i strive to be everything her name for me means. she calls me dad.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

last day 10



arepuchi man

i want to become more like a arepuchi man.
i want to care less how i get to my destination.
i want to keep in mind where i am going.
i want to laugh along the way.
i want to return home smiling.
i want to struggle to find a word for "work".
i want to experience simple pleasure.
i want to make human connection natural.
i want to play without adult hurdles.
i want to laugh from stubbing my toe.
i want to know friendship along the way.
i want to know my tribe well.
i want to be known by my tribe.
i want to understand without resolve.
i want to accept without need to access.
i want to be connected to nature.
i want to plant my food and grow it.
i want to run into the water without reason.
i want to believe that i can become.
i want to start as i am.

"I believe it is possible to start as we are, lost and handicapped, and still find a way back. At least we might learn the direction in which our best interests lie and not go on making efforts that have an equal chance of leading us further off track."-Jean Liedloff, The Continuum Concept